Destructive Daydreams: Why Wishful Thinking is Dangerous

"The problem with positive fantasies is that they allow us to anticipate success in the here and now. However they don't alert us to the problems we are likely to face along the way and can leave us with less motivation—after all it feels like we've already reached our goal."

"...fantasies about an idealized future may indeed lead to poor decisions. Such fantasies create a preference for information about pros rather than cons, particularly when people are not yet serious about pursuing the realization of the future."


"Fantasies that are less positive–that question whether an ideal future can be achieved, and that depict obstacles, problems, and setbacks–should be more beneficial for mustering the energy needed to attain actual success."


http://www.spring.org.uk/2012/06/destructive-daydreams-why-wishful-thinking-is-dangerous.php

How to Avoid Procrastination: Think Concrete

New study finds procrastination is warded off by considering tasks in concrete terms.
those living in technically advanced societies, procrastination has become a 'modern malady'

Summary: how to get things done

1. To avoid procrastinating on a task, focus on its details and use self-imposed deadlines.
2. To stick to a task, while actually carrying it out, now it is beneficial to keep the ultimate, abstract goal in mind.
3. When evaluating progress on a hard task, when the chance of failure is high, stay focused on the details of the task.
4. Once tasks are easier or the end is in sight, a more abstract, goal focus is once again the psychological approach to choose.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2009/01/how-to-avoid-procrastination-think.php

11 Goal Hacks: How to Achieve Anything

1. Stop fantasising
The biggest enemy of any goal is excessive positive fantasising.
Those whose fantasies were more negative did better
Don't experience the future positively before you achieve it.

2. Start committing
One powerful psychological technique to increase commitment is mental contrasting.
This involves entertaining a positive fantasy but then pouring a bucket of cold reality over it

3. Start starting
What the Zeigarnik effect teaches is that one weapon for beating procrastination is starting somewhere...anywhere.

4. Visualise process NOT outcome
Visualising the process of reaching your goal, helps focus attention on the steps you need to take.
It also helps reduce anxiety.

6. Sidestep procrastination
When goals are difficult and we wonder whether it's really worth it, procrastination can creep up on us
Under these circumstances the key is to forget about the goal and bury yourself in the details.
Keep your head down and use self-imposed deadlines

10. Know when to stop
'Sunk costs' refer to the effort or money we've already expended in trying to reach our goal. So, even when our plan is failing, we keep pushing on.

Automatic Drive: How Unconscious Cognitive Biases Help Fire Our Motivation

So how did participants keep themselves motivated when there was much less work to do? You guessed it: they under-estimated the number of t-shirts in the box.
By under-estimating their progress when they were near the end of the task, highly motivated people are able to push themselves on harder towards the end when the temptation is to slack off.

When people are highly motivated to achieve a task, they over-estimate their progress at the beginning and under-estimate it at the end. This helps provide us with the psychological energy to keep us going through the task.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2012/07/automatic-drive-how-unconscious-cognitive-biases-help-fire-our-motivation.php

The Incubation Effect: How to Break Through a Mental Block

When you take a break from a problem you rest your mind and when you come back it's fresher, so you do better.
The break doesn't just freshen you up, it gives your unconscious time to work towards a solution.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2012/07/the-incubation-effect-how-to-break-through-a-mental-block.php

The Worse-Than-Average Effect: When You’re Better Than You Think

sometimes the competent don't know when they're competent.
This is the worse-than-average effect
This means that when you're good at something, you tend to assume that other people are good at it as well.
So, when you're faced with a difficult task that you are good at, you underestimate your own ability.
The moral of the story is simple: sometimes we do ourselves down, especially when faced with a difficult task or when we have special skills. Under these circumstances we are better than we know.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2012/06/the-worse-than-average-effect-when-youre-better-than-you-think.php

Reaching Life Goals: Which Strategies Work

Success in modern post-industrial societies is all about reaching long-term goals

1. Make a step-by-step plan: break your goal down into concrete, measurable and time-based sub-goals.
2. Tell other people about your goal: making a public declaration increases motivation.
3. Think about the good things that will happen if you achieve your goal (but avoid fantasizing - see this article).
4. Reward yourself for making progress in your goal: small rewards help push us on to major successes.
5. Record your progress: keep a journal, graph or drawing that plots your progress.

http://www.spring.org.uk/2011/02/reaching-life-goals-which-strategies-work.php

Fear on Four

The Yellow Wallpaper
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00c8zry

Why Society Doesn’t Change: The System Justification Bias

Have you ever wondered why society hardly ever changes?

humans have a mental bias towards maintaining the status quo.
They tend to go with what they know rather than a new, unknown option.

Poor people don't strongly support the sorts of political policies that would make them better off.
Surveys find that low-income groups are hardly more likely than high-income groups to want tax changes that mean they will get more money.
Generally people's politics doesn't line up with their position in society.

 Oddly, the more disadvantaged people are, the more they are likely to support a system that is doing them no favours. This is because of cognitive dissonance. In one US example of this low-income Latinos are more likely to trust government officials than high-income Latinos.

 Most disturbing of all: the more unequal the society, the more people try to rationalise the system. For example in countries in which men hold more sexist values, women are more likely to support the system.


http://www.spring.org.uk/2012/07/why-society-doesnt-change-the-system-justification-bias.php

Littérature érotique : osez-vous ?

S’intéresser aux textes érotiques, c’est approcher au plus près le mystère de sa propre sexualité, assure Sophie Cadalen, psychanalyste et auteure de romans érotiques.
Quand nous en sortons, nous ne sommes plus pareils, nous mourons à une certaine idée de nous-mêmes. »

Quoi ? Nous pourrions être troublés par ce récit de viol, d’échangisme, de nécrophilie ?
Elles révèlent une attirance pour ces limites, que, dans la vie réelle, nous n’approcherons peut-être jamais
En lisant, nous nous autorisons à vivre en imaginaire l’agressivité, la domination, à éprouver nos propres fantasmes
Comme toujours avec les fantasmes, les approcher ne signifie pas vouloir les vivre

J’adore la littérature sadomaso pour tout ce qu’elle révèle de dépassement de soi dans l’acte sexuel

Pour le dictionnaire Le Robert, est érotique ce qui relève de « l’amour et du plaisir sexuel avec une dimension symbolique », quand la pornographie est la « représentation de choses obscènes destinées à être communiquées au public ». À leur époque, Zola, Flaubert, Henry Miller étaient considérés comme auteurs de pornographie. Les moeurs changent, les sociétés évoluent, les définitions aussi.

Pour le surréaliste André Breton, « la pornographie, c’est l’érotisme des autres ». Pour l’ex-actrice de films  « est pornographique ce qui est description explicite du rapport sexuel »

http://www.psychologies.com/Culture/Philosophie-et-spiritualite/Savoirs/Articles-et-Dossiers/Litterature-erotique-osez-vous